Empty Nest, Full Hearts

Rediscovering Each Other After the Kids Leave

The kids have grown, the house is quieter, and you’re left with a new reality—just the two of you. While the empty nest stage can feel uncertain, it’s also an incredible opportunity to rediscover each other and create a fulfilling new chapter.  Remember the time before kids?  If you're anything like me and my husband, we had a great time the 12 years before we had kids.  Once they were out of the house, we had an opportunity to rekindle our romance.  You will have that opportunity too. 

1. Acknowledge the Shift

It’s normal to feel a mix of emotions—pride, relief, sadness, or even excitement. Talk about how this transition feels for both of you and acknowledge that change is an inevitable part of life. This honesty strengthens your connection.

2. Redefine Your Relationship

Without the daily routines of parenting, your marriage dynamics will shift. What does this new phase look like for you? Discuss shared goals, interests, and dreams you want to pursue together.

3. Find New Shared Interests

Perhaps you once bonded over school activities and raising kids. Now’s the time to discover new hobbies—whether it’s traveling, volunteering, taking a class, or rekindling a past interest together.

4. Prioritize Date Nights and Adventure

Marriage thrives on connection and excitement. Make it a point to schedule regular date nights, weekend getaways, or spontaneous adventures that remind you why you fell in love in the first place.

5. Improve Communication

Without the distractions of kids, you now have more time for meaningful conversations. Discuss current events, books, movies, philosophy, or personal growth—whatever deepens your connection and keeps the conversation flowing.

6. Rekindle Intimacy

With fewer interruptions and a more flexible schedule, it’s a great time to reignite your physical and emotional intimacy. Express affection daily and explore ways to keep your connection fresh and exciting.  I recommend the book, "Come Together:  The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections.  The book is about exploring your sexuality and pleasure - anytime!

 7. Create a Vision for the Future

You’re not just “waiting for retirement.” Dream big! Where do you see yourselves in five or ten years? What legacy do you want to build? Setting shared goals gives you something exciting to look forward to.

Your empty nest is not an end—it’s a beginning. By being intentional about reconnecting, you can create a marriage that is richer, deeper, and more fulfilling than ever before.

If for some reason you are struggling to make your midlife marriage better, reach out and let's have a talk.  I can help you figure it out.